how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
