Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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