I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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