After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
