He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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