i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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