i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
