I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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