good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
