Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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