My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
