oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
