the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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