Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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