i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
