ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I'm both gender and math confused
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
