I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
