wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
