he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Randomize
