i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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