Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
My hand turned me down
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
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