I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
