whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize
