Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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