careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
You need Xanax blowdarts
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
