My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
