"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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