she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
He called his prostate his "boner button".
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Randomize
