Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
