I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
