You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
i came on her dog
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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