...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize