If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
