Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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