Kiss
Puke
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
