belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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