I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
why is half of my head shaved?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
