question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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