I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I am mentally ready for anal.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
