just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
