Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
