FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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