Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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