that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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