i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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