Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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