Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Is it because I queefed?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
He shit in the fireplace
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
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