its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
