Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize
