Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
